Grandpa's Last X-mas

Track 2 of Oi! To The World is a lovely song embracing family values...

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Mommy!

Mom says
'Put on your Christmas best
Grandpa's coming down this year
And it might be his last'
Why mom
You say that every time
It seems that he's been dying
Ever since that I was nine

I don't mean no disrespect
Because he's old and mean
How come we invite him
When he always makes a scene

Tell me why does
He hit me with his cane
And why should I get him a gift
If he don't know my name
How come
He always calls me Kate
And forgets his dentures
On his dinner plate

This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
That's what Mother says
Grandpa's last Christmas
And soon he might be dead
So be nice
Be nice
To Grandpa

What can
I say to someone 300 years old
When he seems so content
Staring at the Jell-o mold
Please mom
Let me go out and play
Or soon I will go deaf like him
From hearing him complain

I know
His life's been long and hard
And he deserves some quiet peace
In a nice graveyard
Grandpa
I love you just the same
But I know you won't be happy
Til you drove us all insane
Just like you

Grandpa's last Christmas
That's what Mother says
Grandpa's last Christmas
And soon he might be dead
So be nice
Be nice
To Grandpa
Cause he's old
And he smells
And he's gonna die soon
Be nice
To Grandpa

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I actually played this at a family Christmas party a couple years ago. My grandpa loved it!

That is all.