Peasant's Quest...

I had some time to kill on my grave shift, so I decided to beat Peasant's Quest. Or, got to the end anyway...you can't beat it. Trogdor's indestructible.

I stunk like a peasant.

I dressed like a peasant.

And I got on fire like a peasant.

Fun for me.

That is all.

It's Not Christmas Yet

I promise. Want proof? isitchristmas.com will tell you.

We still have another holiday to go before Christmas can come. Remember Thanksgiving? That holiday where we eat a lot?

(We do that every day...)

Ok, that holiday where we eat a lot with people that annoy us.

(Oh, he's anti-family...)

Really now. Let Christmas stay in December. Do we start getting ready for Halloween before Labor Day? Or do we see little green dudes all over the store when we go in to buy a card with a big red heart on it? Not so much. (If you do see this in whatever store you go to, please feel free to burn it down.)

So why exactly is it that Christmas is let loose so far before its time? I can't come up with a good answer. Sure, I've got my cynical, idealist rant about how commercialism is ruining Christmas, but that just makes me sound like a pompous douche. And we don't need anymore of those. There are Douche-a-Plenty in these parts. (That's right theBodilys, I used it in a sentence!)

And who in Frick's Crap decided that the day after Thanksgiving had to be the day EVERONE AND THEIR HAIRDRESSER starts shopping? Relax, you freaks! It's because of you all that I don't dare venture outside my house that day. Heck, sometimes I feel like I need to hunker down with a shotgun just to keep the most confused consumerist zombies off of my porch...

Whatever the cause, it is now irreversible. So I will give up my stand to keep Christmas in December and allow it to start on "Black Friday". But until then, NO decorations, NO displays in stores, and for the love of all that is in any way, shape, or form holy, NO CHRISTMAS SONGS ON THE EPHING RADIO!

Jerks.

That is all.

Veteran's Day

Thank you.

To everyone who has served, especially with me.

I know I've complained a lot about being a part of the army, but if I got a second chance, I'd enlist all over again. I don't know what I would be doing, where I would be living, or even who I would be. I've been presented with some amazing opportunities because of the choice I made. And my life has truly been blessed.

If I hadn't joined the army, I wouldn't be marrying Catherine in 11 days.

I joined. I got deployed. I met who would become my best friend. I moved to Logan because of him. I got hired at Youthtrack because of him. I convinced another friend to move to Logan and work with us. He and I moved in with a third friend who introduced me to The Woman I Would Marry.

In addition to Catherine and Patrick, there are several others who I never would have known otherwise. Matticus, Raisor, Mason, Leslita, SSG Hotlips, Shay, and Top Rod. These people have been a great source of happiness and comfort to me. They all get extra special thank you's.

EDIT: Upon completion of this blog, I read thePatrick's. Wow...freaky.

That is all.

PS: A note to the ROTC:
Please don't asplode things around me. Especially unannounced. I understand what you're doing and understand the purpose behind it; I even mildly appreciate it. However, the reason for my appreciation is the very same as the reason for my annoyance. Honoring people who have been around booms by making things go boom doesn't so much make sense to me. We don't like them.

Heart rates increase.
Hands tremble.
Legs give out.
Thoughts scramble, and yet immediately focus at the same time.

It's uncomfortable...

So much cool...

Chontel brought me cream cheese at work last night. She told me to watch Eddie Izzard's standup. I laughed.



Then we randomly stumbled across this nugget of joy. Watch the WHOLE THING!!! At 2 minutes, you will officially lose your mind...



Today, I got this in my e-mail...thanks, Mom



Also, I played this game today. It's fun (f'realz)

On a not-so-rad note, don't go see The Haunting of Molly Hartley. It's beyond dumb.

That is all.

Called. It. !.

Remember a few blogs back when I mentioned Licensed Breeding?

Well, apparently, the Dutch Parliament reads my blog.

Check it out.

Please let this pass.

And spread. Like melted butter.

That is all.

It had to happen eventually...

Last night, the inevitable finally happened. I got RickRoll'd.



What is RickRolling, you ask? It's when one falsely posts a video labeled as something you actually want to watch, but then you're subjected to this.

I don't even remember what I was wanting to watch. But I laughed when it happened. I Wiki'd it and found out that this has been going around for over a year.

People have too much time on their hands.

Myself included. Yes, way, way too much time.

I think Catherine is planning an intervention.

Insanity: An all too familiar feeling...

So I know I just put the live video for this song up a couple weeks ago, but I need to kill some time and this song clocks in at nearly 8 minutes...so typing out the lyrics will help me postpone going to bed a little. But I'm not going to do it like I normally do. No line breaks... No punctuation...

---

Insanity

I'm so sorry please forgive me who do I pray to to straighten out this problem straighten out this problem straighten out my mind straighten out this crooked tongue this crooked tongue this crooked tongue my mind has wandered from the straight and narrow my mind has wandered from the flock you see my mind has wandered the man just said so my mind has wandered I heard it on TV and the flock has wandered away from me now all around the world now like a big bright cherry cloud traveling from home to home TV sets and telephones here it comes just like a storm bathe in it and be reborn time to let the world know welcome madness say hello say hello say hello like a wave we cannot see washing over you and me hiding here and hiding there madness hiding everywhere such a curiosity here it comes to set us free plenty left for you and me say hello insanity I am the virus are you the cure I am morally I'm morally impure I am a disease and I am unclean I am not part of God's well oiled machine Christian nation assimilate me take me in your arms and set me free I am part of a degenerate elite dragging our society into the street yeah into the abyss into the sewer don't you see the man just told me he told me on TV do you think you're better than me do you want to kill me or befriend me the alcoholic bastard waved his finger at me and his voice was filled with Evengelical glee now sipping down his gin and tonics while preaching about the evils of narcotics and the evils of sex and the wages of sin while he mentally fondles his next of kin cause my mind has wandered from the flock you see and the flock has wandered away from me and he waved his hypnotizing finger at me let's imitate reality insanity let's strive for mediocrity insanity let's make believe we're all the same now that's for me let's sanitize our little brains insanity I'd love to take you home with me and tuck you in to bed I'd love to see what makes you tick inside your pretty head I'd love to hear you laugh tonight I'd love to hear you weep I'd love to listen to you while you're screaming in your sleep Christian sons Christian daughters lead me along like a lamb to the slaughter purify my brain hose down my soul white perfection perfection is my goal do you think you're better than me do you want to kill me or befriend me Christian nation make us alright put us through the filter and make us pure and white cause my mind has wandered from the flock you see and the flock has wandered away from me and let's talk of family values while we sit and watch the slaugher hypothetical abortions on imaginary daughters the white folks think they're at the top ask any proud white male a million years of evolution we get Danny Quayle all around the world now like a big bright cherry cloud traveling from home to home TV sets and telephones here it comes just like a storm bathe in it and be reborn time to let the world know welcome madness say hello let's imitate reality insanity let's strive for mediocrity insanity let's make believe we're all the same now that's for me let's sanitize our little brains insanity I'd love to take you home with me I'd love to tuck you in I wish I could protect you from the wages of our sin I'd love to hear you scream tonight I'd love to hear you cry protect you from the madness that is raining from the sky let's imitate reality insanity let's strive for mediocrity insanity let's make believe we're all the same now that's for me let's sanitize our little brains insanity I'd love to take you home with me and tuck you in to bed I'd love to see what makes you tick inside your pretty head I wish that I could keep you in a precious Chinese box on Sundays I would pray for you so it would never stop I'd love to hear you laugh tonight I'd love to hear you weep I'd love to listen to you while you're screaming in your sleep I'd love to soothe you with my voice and take your hand in mine I'd love to take you past the stars and out of reach of time I'd love to see inside your mind and tear it all apart to cut you open with a knife and find your sacred heart I'd love to take your satin dolls and tear them all to shreds I'd love to mess your pretty hair I'd love to see you dead dead dead.

---

by Oingo Boingo

I loves me some Danny Elfman.

That is all.